Talking Point #8 Orenstein, "Cinderella Ate My Daughter"

Reflection:
      As I read "Cinderella Ate My Daughter", I couldn't help think about the toys that I played with at a young age.  I started with baby dolls, even dressed like strawberry shortcake on Halloween, then finally played with barbies and pink with purple logos until the age of ten, then it was computer science games, technology, and even the love of boy bands like the New Kids On The Block.  My mom recalls that one day I just stopped playing with barbies and it was the sudden age of boy bands, technology, and even things that pertained to science.   It was as if a sudden switch went off in my head that it was time to grow up, even though by that age I already had two siblings the ages were seven my sister, and four my brother.  As I watched both of my siblings grow and to see what their toys were and what they are now as I shop for toys for my nephew and cousin's kids. I realize what the author is referring to when she says that the separation of boys and girls in clearly displayed in the toys store.  You go to the boys section and it has so many colors, and then as you enter the fairytale land of pink cotton candy color in the girl's section. I remember my favorite color when I was a little girl to be aqua, and it still is.  I don't remember pink being the center focus of colors when I was young. Is it really the concept of keeping the girls, girls for a lot longer then my generation or the generation after?
     As I think of the Disney movies and the fairy tales all the plots are all the same where a prince tends to save the princess from ruin, destruction, or even death.  I look at my cousin that is going to be five years old, that has the princess birthday parties, and has all the princess' dresses in her wardrobe.  Yeah it is cute and fun, but her own father calls her a princess.  She goes around thinking she is a princess and sets the rules on the games that you may play with her.  If you don't follow her rules then she says, "that she doesn't want to play with you because you don't get the rules and that she is the only princess". 
     The symbolism of the villain in the story is the obstacles that you are to encounter in life, but there is so much jealousy that the villains' have against the princesses.  So if that is the only obstacle that people have to go through in life, that is easy compared with the true issues that people deal with like death, disease, financial struggle, children, and other dilemmas that arise in daily life. So when does reality set in or does it ever?  Those stories don't prepare you for the reality of career decisions, independent thought, and thriving to be a strong woman all the while living life.  The true disillusion of these stories prepares the children of the future for failure, knowing that things are just not handed to them and that they have to work to get what they want out of life. It is such a disappointment to learn that the fairytale, play land and princesses is an economic ploy to boost revenue and use children to get it there.
      So as the prince in the fairytale saves you from death, or whatever he may save you from is the metaphor attributed to the oppression of females. We as females need to learn to love ourselves and treasure our friendships.  The friendships and bonds we make as adults will hopefully last a lifetime, if we learn to appreciate the true people around us.  When these princesses can't even be friends with one another, what great role models. In the magical world of life there is no real prince or even prince charming to save you, you need to save yourself.  Learn to live your life and love yourself before your love others.  So my one question for the class is there such a thing as a magical prince or is that another point of oppression for women?

Talking Point # 7 Kimmel, "What Are Little Boys Made Of?"

Hyperlinks:
      Reading the article, I had to go back and reread it I felt lost but confused at the same time.  For the second time reading the article I noticed that the article was written in account to several authors' thoughts about the male youth, and then growing into male hood.  Then it was followed by the explanation of each author and their thought in regard to the subject.  One author accounts that males in these eras are doing worse then before because the focus was taking off them and instead females became the center focus.  The male hormone testosterone and biology one author felt was the blame for the violent actions of boys.  This happens because of biology and its male hormone counterpart testosterone, that males feel the need to fight each other, and criminal activity.  Studies have revealed that this was inconclusive, because in order to obtain the levels of testosterone, all the males will have to endure a severe testing.  As you can read in this link, it discusses the correlation between young violence and crime to that of alcohol and other things not testerone.
    Another author's view is that the young males have pressure that is placed on them with the passing of youth to men.  The author goes to explain that this is seen in the ritual of "bar mitzvah", if that is the case then females go through the same stress to enter womanhood with bat mitzvah, sweet sixteen, and the quinceanera just to name a few.  Does that mean that we have to reexamine the pressures that we place on our youth to grow up quickly, but in any culture, and any society you see the passing ritual, but in those cultures those males don't go commit crimes or even start fights.  So why is that the American society has these issues?  The author also argues that is seen in the military training to fraternity hazing.  Fraternity hazing doesn't just happen to men but sorority hazing is in the same ranking in accordance to this article, but the reasoning for the deaths is the result of alcohol.  So then the component seems to point to alcohol and the reason for male aggression to be displayed.  So the author argues to "responsibly spank" your child, but if your child was bullying another child at school, spanking is not conveying the correct message, but you are displaying the same action on your child.
     Whether to go through self-esteem or even be bullied by others is not just a male issue.  That happens to females everyday in the school system,too.  As a matter of fact there was a girl that committed suicide due to the bullying that happened to her.  The article discusses the pain of self-esteem in males when in some countries males are preferred over females, for whatever the reason maybe.  As the article refers that more males are depressed then females, I read a article that contradicts that and the information is available in the National Institute of Mental Health.  The NIMH say that young boys and girls under the age of 14 have an equal chance of developing depression, but at the age of 14 yrs.old the girls incidence doubles.  They have different ways of dealing with the depression and the signs might not be similar, that is all found in the article.  There was a study done in the US, that if you were only allowed one child what would the sex be?  The study showed that most couples would prefer a male baby, and if you ask the men they would say the same.  As I started to search the web for articles pertaining to gender, adoptions, abortions, genetic testing, and other things it lead me to a web site with equal statistics on the gender. Would you prefer a boy or a girl, if you could have only one? 
       Boys learn through society's media that deems violence in so many aspects as soon as you turn on the television, to even the news.  The learned behavior from male influence around them to their own peers what ever group they associate themselves with that usually characterizes their outcome.  As I read this and saw that this is conveying that our men suppress their feelings, because other men tell them that it is not right to cry.  I can not say that men are responsible only for telling young men that crying is for girls, because their own mother's will say the same message.  So does our society deem crying is a sign of weakness, or not being manly? It might be conditioned in that society has put into place that if you fall for a young boy it is not okay for them to show emotion.  We need feminist to fight that men can be allowed to show there emotions, that will lead to more sensitive, caring, and understanding men. Watch this YouTube video below on what society believes and what are the men rules for crying if it is allowed?

Talking Point #6 Lorde, "The Master's Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master's House"

Connections:
      Feminist everywhere do you believe that there is justice and equality amongst all women regardless of race,sex orientation,and/or social class?    The author Lorde does not believe that women have even began to be equal to each other, never mind men.  She states that there are so many difference amongst us, how do we expect men to stop oppressing us when we are divided into categories and are not united?  Reading Audre Lorde's essay reminds me of how feminist are divided amongst one another.  She talk's about class, race, and sexual orientation is what brings the divided to keep the rift between the privilege people vs. the poor people.  Allan Johnson agreed with Lorde, when he wrote his essay to speak about the lady that he wanted to work with.  Allan Johnson said, "we all know that a great deal of trouble relating to gender and race, sexual orientation, ethnicity, social class".  Both authors see that there is a problem with these things and it keeps people into specific categories.  These categories are established by society and placed into ranks, and the lower rank being things that society has shunned. Both author's agree that when a woman is in the lower part of all the categories, that they are at a greater disadvantage then the others. We as women are too quick to dismiss each other because of the difference that we might have for what ever the reason maybe, but at the sametime we complain that we are still oppressed. It is crazy that when you go get a job or any public place that they need to meet a quota of different races.  Even research study involving the community needs to have a certain amount of each race represented in order for it to be counted.  Lorde and Rich agree that being a lesbian is hard, and not social accepted.  Rich states," the lesbian, unless disguised, faces discrimination in hiring and harassment and violence in the street. Even within feminist-inspired institutions such as battered-women's shelter and Women's study programs, open lesbian are fired and others warned to stay in the closet."  Here Rich says that even amongst women the lesbians are still separated from other women, and Lorde says see the segregation that is the divide, and existent is the struggle of oppression. Here is an example of a mother being fired because of her sexual orientation.  Lorde is tired of the differences, and she feels that these things need to be addressed, before women can fight equally for the rights of women. It is like black vs. whites, rich vs. poor, lesbain vs. heterosexual.
       The reason for the title: " Master's Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master's House" is various.  Never use the master's tools or the oppressors tools, because they were designed to believe that you concord the master, but instead you have become even more oppressed individual.  Using the tools will only keep the oppressed, even more oppressed, and are only meant to help those in the higher rank of society.  Which is complete idiocy and only meant to keep the oppressed even more oppressed.  So you believe that some women are more oppressed than others? A house that is against and divided can not stand, but a house that is united will stand as a strong force, and can't be torn down.

Youtube video that relates to Class Discussion on LGBT Justice

In class we discussed LGBT justice and I thought of this show on NBC.  Watch on how this couple wants the same things that heterosexual couples want, and considered there life to be the new normal in today's society.

Breast Cancer Awareness Month Events

To all my friends, this week is very important week considering that it is the start of breast cancer awareness month. I invite you and your families to help me celebrate survival. Please join me on upcoming events which are open to the public. On Friday, October 5,at 6:00pm in downtown Marriott on 1 Orms St., it will be the calendar reveal for 2013 and I am Miss September. Saturday, October 6,  at 12:00 pm festivities begin and then at 6:30 pm starts the torch that will be carried from the State House to the waterfires.  Then from the torch ceremony starts the night festivities. I will be signing calendars from 12pm until 1:30pm that day. Sunday, October 7, at 11:00 am begins the race to the finish 5k. If you have not signed up please do, even though the registration on line is closed you can still sign up on the day of from 8:00am until 10:00 am. I hope to see you all in helping me celebrate life. Thank you for your support.  These are just a few and you can use them for your social justice event assignment. <3 Sue